Do you like sucking on blue Jolly Ranchers while cracking pistachios with your teeth? Then you’ll love Red Bull’s new Winter Edition energy drink. It’s supposed to vitalize your body and mind. What the can doesn’t tell you is that it reciprocates your sip love with one of the most rancid burps I’ve tasted in a long time. The smell generated frowns from all those around me. So? It’s kind of a win-win situation.
I give Red Bull’s Pistachio & Berries an 8 out of 10.
I’d definitely guzzle it again. Though, it has left me with draggy eyelids and a drifting attention span. It seems to be working in the exact opposite way the can promised. Maybe that’s just my low blood sugar?
As advertised, it does remind me of scarfing nuts and finger fruits off a charcuterie board at any given holiday get-together. They got that taste profile right. I feel like I’ve been whisked through a Thanksgiving Eve chug-a-long at the local Grange.
I started this journey with the crack-open smell test. The first whiff delivered a strong artificial berry smell. Not any particular pericarp. Not at first. But as I inhaled the vapors, I began to detect a chubby raspberry stench.
Next came the sip. Hmm. Almost all Red Bull flavors just end up tasting like Red Bull to me. That Taurine tang is omnipresent. This weighed heavy in the front with a true mixed berry sort of matte finish. It wasn’t until another couple guzzles that I could start to feel the Pistachio kicking through.
Midway into the can, the nutty side of this holiday concoction started to loudly ring its bell. I can only equate it to a mouthful of Kool-Aid saliva tonguing the inside of an unsalted nut bag. Imagine sipping micro-shots of buckleberry extract straight out of a discarded Pistachio shell.
Red Bull claims there are hints of caramel swirled within the berries and nuts, but I missed those cues. It is not creamy as advertised. But I think that’s ok. I don’t want creamy in my energy drink.
I do like the Pistachio green-colored can. It is a calm, attractive tint that immediately called to me from across the store. The PepsiCo stock boy told me the other day that this Winter Flavor wasn’t supposed to be sold individually in stores yet. I know it comes in the $49.99 Red Bull Advent Calendar. I actually found my solo can at The Dollar Tree, where they had about twenty in stock. Half of them in a cooler for ice-cold perfection.
I’d never drink this warm.
The can promises there are NO nuts contained within. Who knows where they scraped the Pistachio notes from? There is a Sugar Free version, but DrScreams don’t mess with that bad business. Give me sugar or give me depth.
Red Bull: The Winter Edition Pistachio & Berries is a perfect beverage for kicking yourself awake while wandering into any unwanted yuletide invitation. I won’t lie, but man am I sleepy after drinking that whole can. It gave me a tiny, little stomach ache. That’s ok, I’ll definitely buy more cans whenever I skip by them at the impulse kiosk. I liked it. Almost a lot.
